In my opinion, reversing this scarring is one of the most difficult challenges facing a survivor. My hope is that I am able to continue to share the emotional barriers that I have recognized. The scars never go away.
Some feelings I saw as brand new: I'd never experienced these before recovery. Well, let me be a little more clear ~ some feelings I don't recall having ever felt before starting to heal. At some point I will find the notes about the first day I felt happy ~ and My Scarlet Letter will include a positive thread. I know that because I feel happy some days now. Once I discovered what it meant 'to feel happy', I found I rather liked it.
Until then:
- - - Forever Scars - - -
I can't help thinking as I lie here,
holding tightly to a red teddy bear;
how scared, angry and anxious I feel,
returning to the time with pain everywhere.
A familiarity is sensed from darkness,
dreams of confusion, chaos and such;
emotional upheaval adds to this mess,
with one demand, "get undressed".
Why in explaining, do I scribe this way?
the flow to the sound of iambic penta-
meter, keeps my thoughts astray,
a poem takes form and describes past days.
Ggr
Until then:
- - - Forever Scars - - -
I can't help thinking as I lie here,
holding tightly to a red teddy bear;
how scared, angry and anxious I feel,
returning to the time with pain everywhere.
A familiarity is sensed from darkness,
dreams of confusion, chaos and such;
emotional upheaval adds to this mess,
with one demand, "get undressed".
Why in explaining, do I scribe this way?
the flow to the sound of iambic penta-
meter, keeps my thoughts astray,
a poem takes form and describes past days.
Ggr